R.I.P Ipod Mini

I love my Ipod. I don't think I have left the little thing at home since I got it three years ago. Its the first electronics device that I didnt try and upgrade while it was still working- I THINK.

This morning on the way to work as I rocked out to my "Dance Dance" mix featuring songs I love to sing and dance too, Ipod just make a crazy noise and died. It wont turn off and it wont play. Its just sitting in the middle of "Love is a battlefield" by Pat Benetar. I have known for about two weeks that this moment was coming, I mean Ipod has been sluggish and wont upload very quickly but I took it to the apple store and they appeared to fix it for a day or two. They also offered me the 10% ipod recylce program information- thats when I knew my time with ipod mini was coming to a grave end.

I just really dont want to walk in the Apple store tonight and trade in mini for a nano and it still be stuck on Love is a Battlefield- Why couldnt it have died on something considered cool like Pat Green or Snow Patrol. I mean I love 80s music but last time I went in to get it looked at the guy asked me if I was a really big fan of the 80s and started laughing. I am willing to bet with the way my life works that the same kid will be the one to help me tonight.

RIP lil Ipod Mini- you were a good travel companion and mix master.

Song o' the day is
"Love is a Battlefield" by Pat Benetar- If thats how little Ipod wanted to go out then I will just have to respect it.

-Liz

Congrats!! Your hip isnt pregnant!

I really hate Dallas traffic and having to get up earlier to make my early arse doctors appointment only makes getting stuck in traffic worse. I was late by 5 minutes, and since I know what doctors schedules are like- this irks me alot.

Today we did the usual dig his fingers as far into my hip as he can and I wince for 20 minutes. This is also coupled with him doing these stretches that to the innocent bystander walking by his office windows look like we are practicing moves straigh from the Kama Sutra. It didnt help that he said during the stretch on my hip, "Look how much more range of motion you have now." I am not mature enough for this- and neither is the trainer who walked by and bugged out his eyes looking at us.

Then Dr. VB (which his name still makes me laugh) said "Lets try an utlrasound to break up some scar tissue."
So im lieing there, left hip covered in goop while a little wand goes over it and sends ultrasonic waves into my hip and breaks up the scar tissue. This all sounds like hocus pocus to me. Having a good sense of humor, the trainer that came into ask DR. VB a question said- "Whats wrong with this her hip?"
DR.VB responded with, "Scar tissue."
Trainer: "Congrats miss, your hip isnt pregnant" and then he walks out of the room.

I just laughed and went to change into something work appropriate and headed for work. Honestly, who thinks thats the right thing to say?

-Liz

Ive been hit in a drive by drunk iming....

Ohhh who doesnt love returning home at 3am (to lindsays apartment) and then my apartment at 730am to find something like this waiting. The first line is in response to my asking "Chrisman" (whos name has been changed by himself while drunk and I will use to protect his real identity) to im me a song.

1:24 AM
well you could, but i would have to put pants on...yeah i just got back from a wedding....
1:25 AM
on a scale of 1 to sober i am a 9
meaning in drunk as a duck
yes it did take me 9 minutes to type that with a lot of backspaces
but so what
1:30 AM
oh mama cita i had a blast tonight
great weddint between curtman and chrisman
1:35 AM
err curtman and cvaitlan
with chrisman being an onlooker

This is how I responded....
2:20 PM
you had fun last night...

I have yet to hear back from this gentleman- I would like to hear about the wedding between Curtman and Cvaitlan. I dont know people by those names, so Im excited to get some details from the "Chrisman". Lindsay had something similar waiting on her computer so I got to be entertained twice.

Reason #123 I am pushing for "Chrisman" to be our third roomie and join the world of true and amazing... He is just too too funny! I still havent been able to get that song yet.

-Liz

Tattoos for two?

Happy Post-Birthday Yager. Yager Fest '06 was quite a fest. Billy showed up in a tux with Gretchen and explained how he "cured AIDS" for the rest of the night. They also provided the X-Rated Passion Fruit Vodka- which gets an A plus. Lindsay kicked some serious arse at Fooseball and went fishing for blue polo- who turned out to be a big dumb chubby chaser. I got hit on by a kid that I met previously who was heartbroken because at our previous meeting I was the only one who didnt laugh at his jokes, so this time he wanted to find a way to make me laugh. I got kissed (on the hand) by a deaf guy, who was quite lovely. Then to top off the night I got hit on by a guy waiting outside the bathroom that had decided that covering at least 85% of his body in tattoos was the absolute best thing he could do. He even used the phrases, "You dont go for tattooed guys? Dont like the bad boys?" NO, NO I DONT. Not getting the hint, he tried a second time- this time 10 minutes later with orange vodka shots. "Come on, what do I have to do to get you to stay here and hang out with me?" Thats when Lindsay showed up and saved my life by saying we had to leave.

Seeing as how it was catchabobo night/ fishermans day- I wasnt prepared for the cornacopia of fish that would just jump in the boat- too bad they were all fish I had to throw back. If only friday night had been fishing night, I had my eye on a winner!

How did it get to be Sunday already?

Are you up for it? No? Oh, well you're a loser.

Just thought you all might like to know more about erectyle disfunction. The name of the drug whose website I pulled this info from has been altered to protect, well, my own ass. Enjoy.



SEEALIS helps increase blood flow in the penis when a man is sexually stimulated.

SEEALIS can help men with ED get and keep an erection satisfactory for sexual activity. Once a man has completed sexual activity, blood flow to his penis decreases, and his erection goes away.

SEEALIS is clinically proven to improve erectile function in most men with ED, including those with mild, moderate or severe ED. In clinical trials, SEEALIS improved:
Confidence in ability to achieve and maintain an erection
Satisfaction with the hardness of erections
Ability to maintain erections for successful sexual intercourse
Satisfaction with sexual intercourse

- Lindsay

WWCD? What would Carmen Do?

While we answer to many names, "Danger" and "Awesome" among them its time to unveil our stripper names courtesy of one of the 200 forwards I recieved yesterday from my friend Tomi. Seeing as how both of us are close personal friends with Carmen and her "workout" videos it only seemed appropriate. Henseforth our stripper names are "Lola SilverThighs" and "Heidi LustyTush." I think Carmen would be proud.

Yeah, its finally 10:30am I should probably actually do some billable work.

Song o' the day: "Whatever Lola Wants" from the Damn Yankees Musical.
Because whatever Lola wants, Lola gets- and I like that.

-Lola

Dr. VB

I have to admit I am a medical snob. It comes from 23+ years of amazing doctors and surgeries. I never made a medical move without my father having researched the heck out of the doctor- or I personally have known the Doc since I was born. I realize this is not the case for your average kid, so I accept and have confirmed this snobbery with other doctor's children.

This brings me to my injury- I have a weak Stableizer (sp?) muscle meaning that when i run my left hip just goes in and out of socket. I have been dealing with this all my life- so I thought "Oh sore muscle" after my 5 mile run. NO- I PULLED A MUSCLE, then just for fun I ran another 5 miles the next day. Then I started limping. Turns out the muscle healed and it healed short meaning I have to get it to lengthen or something. Dr. VB is supposed to be the best, and if pain is the measure of best- I on MY VERY OWN- chose the best. I have awesome little bruises all over my left hip bone and up and down my thigh. Supposedly if I let him do this three times a week for 7 weeks- I will be back to being my usual bionic self- or thats all the sessions my health insurance will pay for. Either way- I now have to get up out of my desk chair every half an hour and stretch which goes over really well with my boss because he already has issues with my doing cartwheels when I'm happy.

The real reason that I like Dr. VB more then your average doctor is that his name is "VB". If you know my future roomate- then perhaps you know a connection, and if you don't its not yours to know.

I get to go to my second "session" at 8am tomorrow and then go to work. Im really hoping I can get a cane or something awesome to go with the whole hobbling/limping action I have going for me.

Seriously, whoever you are- GROW A PAIR because none of us like the vague angry posts. I would much prefer posts that prove how "danger"ous and "awesome" we really are, not the cryptic ones. This goes for boys we know in general- we are getting sick of having to ask you to grow a piece of anatomy you were supposed to have had at birth.

GOOO MAVs!

Grrrrrrrrrrrrr

I'm mad at you. You know who you are. Yeah, that's right. Grow some fucking balls. Seriously. You know what you want. You don't deserve it, which is all the more reason to go for it. Douchebag.

Duck Call Kazoo

As some of you know, I live in the Ghetto- and not the fun ghetto. MTV really glams up that whole lifestyle. This is nothing fabulous about my ghetto. There are however lots of scary people running around my apartment complex until all hours of the night, and kids constantly playing "dont get hit by cars" in the parkinglot. Ill finally leave you with the thought that someone was actually murdered one building over from me... YAH! Awesome!

Last night was a wonderful example of why my apartment is creepy/and funny.

Its 11 at night- I am thinking of whether I want to go to sleep or continue to stare glassy eyed at my computer. I want my darn pat green song for my ringtone on my phone- so far the song has been an elusive little freak and I cant find it anywhere on the internet. Ian and Chris tried to be my knights in computer technology and find a way for me to get it, but alas no- I had to settle for my favorite CCR song. While talking to Ian the most amazing thing happened, I started to hear duck calls. This is funny for two reasons.
1.) Its like 11:30 on a Monday night.
2.) Ian's aim icon is a rubber ducky and we were talking about the duck like the duck was real and pouting- really I think you had to be chatting at that moment to get it. (I was pouting about not being able to find my song, Ian was pouting about not living in Texas yet, and the duck was pouting because it was Ians ichat icon, and i said that the duck didnt look like it was pouting.)

I got myself out of bed to go look for the duck call, because if it was a real duck I was going to take it and let it live in my bathtub. I would have named it crackers, because that seems like a wonderful name for a duck. It was however not a duck, it was a large black gentleman who was outside my peephole playing the duck call like it was a kazoo or something. I have never seen him before and I know my neighbors, so this was somewhat creepy (and you have to admit funny). So I watched him for a minute, took my phone and my bat into my bedroom, went back to chatting for a bit and went to bed. Mr. Duck call played his darn duck call kazoo until like 12:30 and then vanished to play somewhere else another day.

I really cant wait to move... August 26th seems very far away.

-Liz

Hello, My Parents Were Hippies

June 9 - 9:36 PM
WalMart
Lewisville, TX

Yes, I spent my Friday night at WalMart. My checkout experience was a much more pleasant one for one simple reason. My cashier's name...

SUNBEAM

Meet Virginia

So I am on my first trip to Virginia- whose state tagline is "Virginia is for Lovers." My first flight was pretty bad after an amazing night at M Streets Bar that included Mav's domination, and my getting married and divorced in a three hour span. I pretty much adore Ampers& and the Ampers& founding fathers. (me and tyson).

After Lindsay dropped me at the airport at 5, and I made the last call for my flight, I thought the day could only go up. Until I get the "Long story I missed my flight" voicemail from Sarah upon my arival in Detroit for my layover. You want a fun airport- DETROIT!! Crazy tunnels and stuff, horrible baseball team- great airport. Einstein Bros bagels right next to my gate was the best thing ever UNTIL the guy sitting next to me on my tin can of a flight to Roanoke spilled his bagel creamcheese side down on me. My black shirt looked amazing. They almost lost my luggage as well, it was the last piece off the plane 30 minutes after I arrived. All lindsay told me to do was take care of the darn suitcase since it was hers,about 20 minutes after everyone else had walked away from baggage claim, I was starting to dread calling her and telling her that her graduation present has been temporarily been misplaced.

Sarah arrived 5 hours after she was supposed too. We rented a bitchin Neon for the night (neon blue thanks!) named it blueberry and got to know Roanoke. The next day Ian stole it to go get us coffee and made us return it and he rented a.... ARMADA!! Go Nissan!, I am proud to report we have offroaded this thing everywhere we can and it is handling it beautifully. The "Mada" has been an exceptional part of the trip, the pictures to follow will be amazing. We are so "Dallas", my side ponytail went over like salt in an open wound at the bar we went too for Eileen and Andrew, but the Mavs won! I dont think that the Virginia boys knew how to handle me, after the fourth "you actually watch sports?" question- I got irritated and just started glaring. We got kicked out of that bar about 30 minutes later- THANKS MATT! The "Louie" has been making the rounds as a two person purse, and we got ourselves some Chanel sunglasses to complete our "Wow, yall are not from around here" look. Ian has been a total sport and driving our snobby little butts around, and documenting it with the camera.

Its been cold here the entire time, I never thought I would miss the Texas heat. I didnt pack enough jackets and it suddenly rains here, I cant quite prepare myself for all the things that randomly just start happening. Also if anyone ever tells you "Yah, we dress up to go out-" THEY ARE LIEING. Just wear a shirt and flip flops, they stare at you like you are from outerspace when you walk in wearing any kind of a heel. Then they tell you how beautiful you are, which is a nice ego boost, but remembering you could be in flip flops is irritating. All in all, so far its been an excellent trip worthy of documentation. Tonights wedding should be full of surprises (some actually by us) and good friends and good wine. Who wouldnt have fun in a vineyard on the side of a mountain. I just hope the Mada can take it.

Meet Virginia is the song o' the day- because I am in Virginia and its the only song I know with Viriginia in the title.
-Liz

Catch UP

Ok, its time for one of those posts that catches you up on several weeks. Its like the Greys Anatomy episode where all they do is review stuff you already know and get you all ready for the next couple of episodes. Only you might not know about some of the stuff thats been going on.

I have not been at my apartment on a weekend in 6 weekends now. Between two Austin lake trips, Advertising works weekend in Norman, OU graduation in Norman, and several trips home- I have no idea what Dallas looks like on a Saturday morning.

This is amusing because it leads to alot of stories. I will recap the best weekends briefly.
1.) Ad Works Weekend- A bunch of us told stories about getting jobs, and I bought a dress with Koi on it. The Koi dress came in handy the next weekend I was home for an engagement party. Lindsay, Lauren and I bought the most kick ass champy glasses ever and we saw Bob Stoops at Louies.

2.) OU GRADUATION- I rode in a taxi cab in norman where the cab driver talked about masterbation. I thought stuff like that only happens on HBO, and even then- I'm not watching it. Heard the best meet the parents story ever. Went to the OU Law School Grad party and danced with my favorite graduate. My group then ate Pita Pit at 2am and sang Row Row Row your boat. After that we played the amazing game "How many people can you fit in a G35". After seven peeps we made people get out and call a cab.

3.) Memorial Day Weekend in Austin- 72 hours on a boat. Lindsay took her turn as the cursed lady of the lake and bit it by 3pm on Saturday. THis is after she coined the phrase "STOP DROWNING ME WITH CONCERN." She screamed this at me in the lake, which is why its so funny. Ralph the boston terrier became the official mascot of the Lady B. Good and wore a lifevest.
Lindsay actually made ralph swim to shore in the cove Saturday morning with myself and our friend Jen swimming with her. On our little boat we had the majority of the time, 3-4 boys, 3 girls, 1 keg of lonestar, 240 jello shots, and about three coolers full of things like Lonestar Light (for Jen), Champagne in a Can (for me and so classy I might add) and Keystone (for Lindsay). There was also food for cooking out, 4 bottles of champy for breakfast drinks, and 2 jugs of OJ, and about 20 waters. No one went thirsty this weekend. I took a picture with a parrot on my shoulder. Jen and I went sliding on a guys boat we dont know, spawning a fight with her boyfriend. Lesbians tied up next to us, and did everything they could to prove just how lesbian they were. There was a shaving cream fight, them grabbing each others body parts, a throw down makeout session that made straight men sick, and last but not least straight girls taking body shots on them trying the whole lesbian experience. This was easily one of the sicker things I have ever seen. There was also alot of 8th grade behavior on the part of several members of the boat who shall remain nameless because I was included in the behavior and also just because it led to in my opinion the worlds most awkward car ride home. Lindsay would probably mention here that there were some PG-13 plus moments on the boat also but this is getting too long as it is.

We made it home alive, and now I am once again packed and ready for my 7th weekend outside of Dallas this time for an adventure in Virginia in Roanoke- the lost colony! My old roomate and friend Eileen is getting hitched and who wouldnt want to watch that in a Virginia Vinyard?


Im also going to point out one last thing thats ironic and funny. I spent 72 hours on a boat with three Chiropractic students, all of whom I believe are going to be wonderful at what they do seeing as how Jen made my shoulder feel tons better. The ironic and funny part is- I walk into the gym to meet my trainer Glen last night, and some of the first words out of his mouth after I say my hip hurts and he looks at it for a sec- "Do you have insurance? You are all messed up, we have a chiropractor here on staff that needs to set that and loosen it up." He then said the same about my knee, and how I need to get this taken care of sooner rather then later. He said I was walking funny as a result- Why the heck didnt those kids notice if its as bad as he made it seem? I mean I had on workout clothes in front of him and he could see it- I had on a bathingsuit in front of them.

Ampers& happy hour tonight- Get excited kids, if it leads to the pics like it did last time... everyone is in for some serious treats!

Song o' the day is- "Who do you love"- by Cross Canadian Ragweed because its what happens to be playing as i write this and because its an excellent cover. So kids... WHO DO YOU LOVE?

-Liz